29 May 2010

a day in the life

^ It's a good Beatles song, check it out. ^

Last night I ended high school. At five o' clock this morning, I arrived home from my very last school-sponsored activity of my whole public/mandatory/childhood/parentally-dependent education.

Hmmm... I take issue with my own word choice. 'Public' is fine I guess, though far from fitting... I think all of life includes 'mandatory' education. My 'childhood' is nowhere near concluded. I'm still 'parentally-dependent' right now, and I will be still when formal 'education' resumes in the fall. (Dorms are so expensive!)

Education is not my point.
So I'll get back to getting to it.

The graduation milestone is littered with comments like "Here comes the real world," or "Now it's time for real life," or "You're starting a new chapter of your life," or "You're not a kid anymore," et cetera.

The Real stuff. I guess that all 18 years and 5 months haven't been life, they've been... I don't know. Surreal life? In the imaginary world?

Well the Real World was anxious to meet me I suppose. Today gave me a brand new list of experiences-- fingers I would have to put down if someone brought these up while playing I Have Never.

  • I got home past 5 am.
  • I signed legal documents without being called a "minor".
  • I had a breathalyzer test.
  • I had a medical professional inform me that I was not drunk.
  • I gave a urine sample.
  • I signed a form for tax purposes.
  • I listened to traffic reports on the radio... By choice... For my own benefit.

There are more that I'm forgetting, I'm sure.

To dispel any worry, I was not in trouble. Most of the new experiences were donated by participation in a medical study.

If this is day one of Real Life, I nervously look forward to the days to come.
Real Life.
Life in general is a terrifying thing. I think that's why it has the potential to be beautiful. It demands reflection, consideration, and practice. It requires spontaneity, leaps of faith, and new experiences. It's fragile. It's resilient.......

It's life. It happens. Hopefully life doesn't happen at you, or to you, but with you, or for you. ... I guess best of all would be if your life happened because of you.

... Hmm....

It's late. I need to put these thoughts to bed.

26 May 2010

they are more than half-way out

I'm the middle kid.

Now that I'm graduating, my parents are more than halfway through the kids in high school madness.

My sister's graduation lasted three hours, if I remember right. It was an undesirable experience, especially, I imagine, for my parents who couldn't go climb around under the seats...

I remember very little of Sean's ceremony, but I remember many pictures taken outside, when it was over. And I remember dinner afterward, because not only was it memorably delicious, but Sean and I both got to order a pricey Italian soda. He had just graduated, and I'd just finished middle school... I guess that getting out was qualification. ...heh...

With certainty I can declare that I remember more about Calvin's graduation than he does himself. This is because I was there the whole time, but he was not. His practicality made for a circumvention of Pomp & Circumstance. (I'm pretty sure he graduated with either honors or high honors.... I'm leaning toward normal-height honors, because he wanted a free period, which meant he was a credit short of the higher kind. Like I said: he is practical. High honors wouldn't do anything extra for him, but a free period would provide time for such and such, so honors is okay. Y'know. Whatever.) Despite his academic qualification, he didn't participate in the graduation ceremony. He didn't see any use for it. But when one of his best friends ended up being chosen to speak, he decided to go, only to listen to that speech. When it was over, Calvin left. I had to perform with the orchestra. I had to get there earlier and stay later than the graduates. ... Oh well.

Anyway, thanks to the PHS alumni, I have a formal graduation announcement. Sean took a picture, and then made it look good, and Olivia put Sean's work with some really nicely designed graphics. (Of course it's nice. Olivia can now add a BYU graduation to her collection: BFA in Graphic Design.) They both worked hard and happily. ... And Calvin I suppose did the same, but over in London... which made this possible in less obvious ways. It's true, just go with it.

Here is my graduation announcement, thanks to my graduate brothers and sister.

That's it.

10 May 2010

i like the word 'ferocious'



Just feel it, it feels nice.

'Ferocious' etymologically means 'fierce looking'. I think it's the looking half of that meaning that allows people to use ferocious in an endearing way. ... When I picture a kid that I'd describe as 'ferocious', I see, for example, my little brother. His excitement, his intensity, his passion, his courage.

Ferocious. Its dictionary definition isn't as endearing.
'Ferocious' could describe my April, by either definition. Both. I was really bad at doing anything beyond the world of AP Testing. Honestly, much of the AP-centered time was spent wishing that I had my moleskin instead of whatever notebook happened to be in front of me, and trying to want to try to concentrate. (This is not a very effective study routine, and I wouldn't really recommend it.)

But my AP weeks are over! All I have now is my IB Music test, but that's in two weeks. (The time dedicated to that test will be ferocious to me as well, but probably more productive and reasonably spaced out.)

The new Ferocious in my life at present is the orphaned child of those conquered AP Test-prep Ferociouses. (The prep stressed me. The tests were tiring, but quick; I don't frequently find myself stressed when I'm taking a test. Only before....) My new Ferocious will be recovering. The prep madness had me acting quite negligent toward most everything else. My room, for example, holds a ferocious mess. Another example would be my AP US History grade. Ironically, I was so focussed on the test that some assignments were left unfinished.

A major evidence: Blog Post.
(Although, this is also because I am taking a break... Heh.)

I have more posts coming. May will maybe show ferocious numbers of blog posts. Hopefully.

That's all for now though,